Holy Sh*t! Airplane Manners, People!

It leaves you speechless alright, and sometimes not in a good way.

So, yesterday I flew back to New York after a week and a half with my family in Detroit.  The flight from NYC->DETROIT is typically a quick hour and a half flight, and relatively painless: key words being “relatively painless.”  Yesterday’s flight was anything but.

I seriously cannot believe the array of stupidity that I saw yesterday.  People have actually survived in life thus far being so completely unaware and clueless?!  The sh*t show of bad manners was ridiculous, both through normal airport protocol, and simple airplane etiquette.  C’mon these things we should all know by now, people!

First Offender:  The So-Called “I Didn’t Realize I Just Cut in Front of You…” Person:

By now, you have all probably had your own run-in with this type of person.  It’s the person who cuts in front of you, and pretends that they didn’t see you there.  This person might also pretend to be looking at something, than casually inch closer and closer, until they downright step in front of you.  It’s a sneaky little tactic, and most of the time these people get away with it, because the person they cut in front of, is too embarrassed to speak up and say something.

So, yesterday I didn’t have one, two, three, or four people cut in front of me.  I had FIVE!  Yes, you heard me right, FIVE.  It all started when a young woman with a giant suitcase cut in front of me while I was waiting in line to check into my flight.  It bugged me, but I didn’t say anything, because I was there very early and I decided to give the girl the benefit of the doubt.  I kept seeing her look over her shoulder as if she was waiting for someone, and I thought that was odd.  Suddenly a man and a woman, whom I’m guessing were her parents, joined her in line with two enormous suitcases in tow.  Before I even had the chance to process the stupidity of these people, two more young women joined the crew of three.  Each of these girls had enormously stuffed suitcases as well.  As the group stood there, loudly chatting about, I decided to say something.  “Excuse me,” I said trying to match their collective volume, “I was here first, and you…” It was no use, no one even noticed me talking.  They were so engrossed in conversation with each other that I didn’t even get a second glance.  I gave up, but it didn’t stop me from angrily brooding over it for the next twenty minutes, and posting multiple rants about it on Facebook and Twitter.

I watched on in horror as one after another stepped up to the check-in counter, and had to be told that each one of their bags were overweight.  They bitched and moaned about the additional charges of a bag over fifty pounds, and luckily the woman behind the counter  stood her ground.  The whole debacle added close to thirty extra minutes onto my schedule, and I was livid.

When it came time to go through security, I saw the party of five making their way in the same direction as me, so I hauled a** as fast as I could, and managed to successfully get in front of them.  A small victory for such an annoying fiasco.

Second Offender:  The Dreaded “I’m Going to Perform all of my Gross Rituals in Public…” Person:

Being a regular commuter in my daily life has taught be a lot about reading people while traveling.  For example, I can spot someone who wants to talk for the whole flight, and I’m good at predicting whether someone will be considerate.  The minute I saw this man approaching I just knew I was in for it.  I prayed he wasn’t going to be the one to occupy the seat next to me, but of course he was.  It’s always like that, isn’t it?  First of all, he stepped on my toe while getting to his seat, and also hit the woman in the head who was sitting behind us.  He never apologized to either of us.

It could have been an accident, so I chalked it up to an honest mistake.  That is, until he proceeded to get himself very comfortable, and one of the ways he accomplished that was by taking off his smelly sandals.  His feet reeked of vinegar, and everyone around us turned to see who was creating the stench.  If that wasn’t enough, he picked and prodded his smelly feet for at least a half hour, while I tried not to gag.

Eventually he passed out into a peaceful slumber, but he was the only one who found peace.  The rest of us had to listen on as he noisily snored, and I personally had to deal with his elbows as he slept with both of his arms up above his head.  Don’t even get me started on the offensive body odor that emanated from his pits.  When he finally awoke, he got up to use the restroom, and stayed in their for at least fifteen minutes.  When he finally resurfaced, I decided to use the bathroom as well.  It wasn’t a surprise to me, when I walked into the cramped space that he carelessly left the toilet seat up, and may or may not have urinated all over the bathroom floor.

The flight ended up being terribly delayed because of rain storms in New York, so we circled around for close to an hour, and until it was safe to land.  For the rest of the flight I tried my best to tune him and all of his bad manners.  I think I actually succeeded at it for a little bit, too, but by that time the flight was over anyhow.

I really thought I had seen it all between the subway in New York, and traveling on the Long Island Railroad.  However, yesterday it became obvious to me that there is clearly still a lot more to see.  Lucky me.

Does anyone else have any bad manner airport/airplane experiences to share?!  Is anyone else disgusted by how some people behave?

~The End

Photo by Pinterest.

4 Awkward Things That Have Happened to me Lately…

1. Practically giving my client a shower at work the other day.

The experience should have been something like this.

Everyone can agree that when they go in to get a hair cut at a salon that the shampoo portion of their overall experience is essential, right?  It sets the stage and is sort of a foreshadowing of what the rest of the service will be like.  Well, the other day, I had a little mishap when shampooing my first client of the day.  The woman came in, swinging her bright orange purse, with an assertiveness that made me a little nervous.  She plopped down in the chair that sits in front of the shampoo bowl and told me exactly how she wanted her hair and then informed me that her main goal was to relax and “veg out for the next hour.”  I said okay, and proceeded to turn the water on, which was the part where, as if on cue, I lost control of the shampoo hose and accidentally sprayed her (and me) and the entire surrounding area around us.  The hose slipped out of my hand like it had a mind of its own.  The more I tried to catch it, the worse the water got all over the place.  I blurted out something frantic like, “I’m sorry there was conditioner all over it and it slipped out of my hand,” and braced myself for the reaming I was sure I was about to receive.  Luckily  she graciously forgave me as she dabbed her smeared mascara, and told me it was no big deal.  I was thankful, but I couldn’t help still feeling incredibly awkward after that.

2. Repeatedly getting stuck in awkward conversations with my landlord.

I have a hunch- the old lady cartoon dubbed “Maxine” could quite possibly have been based on my landlord.

Okay, so don’t get me wrong, I sort of love my old lady landlord who lives across the hall.  Sure, she is always popping out of her apartment and getting in the mix of whatever I’m doing, but she is incredibly entertaining.  She is great with one-liners, and she loves to counsel me on how to stay young.  Amongst her most quotable advice that I’ve already been given in the one short month we’ve lived in our apartment has been, “Eat chicken,” which she yelled out to me randomly one day as I was getting my mail in the foyer of our building.  Another one of her gems was, “Wait to have kids- kids complicate everything.” But probably my favorite words of wisdom so far was, “Eat corn- it keeps you regular so that you are not constipated.  Being constipated gives you wrinkles from clenching.

See the thing is, I never really know how to react to these haphazard statements, so I usually end up just smiling and nodding.  The one thing that I can be sure of, though, is that this landlord (who shall remain nameless) is certain to appear as a character in some of my writing in the future, because she is so fun, colorful, and wonderfully awkward.

3. Almost kicking the girl giving me a pedicure smack-dab in the face.

Picture this:  You have extremely ticklish feet and the girl giving you a pedicure is practically tickle torturing you with the nail filer.  It was stuff nightmares are made out of.  Trust me.  Last weekend I went in for a pedicure, and the girl who normally does my nails was busy.  I was in a hurry, so I took the first available nail technician.  I informed her that I was very ticklish feet and to bypass both the foot massage and heel filing part of the pedicure.  Well, I don’t think she understood me, and she must have thought I was telling her to simply do that part more gently, because she was being so delicate with my feet that after two straight minutes of her lightly scraping the heels of my feet with the foot filer, I couldn’t take it anymore and my foot sprang up involuntarily and came two inches from kicking her clean in the face.  I felt really bad and apologized a bunch of times.  However, even then I don’t think I got the message through, because she picked the torture device (foot filer) back up, and resumed lightly filing my feet.  Ugh.

4. Overhearing a TMI conversation.

Trust me honey, nobody wants to hear your convo.

I was oddly getting cell phone service on the subway the other day, when the train was stalled above ground for a few minutes.  There I sat, minding my own business and texting a friend, when a woman, around my age, had gotten on at the stop right before and sat down next to me.  Almost immediately, she decided to make the most out of the train delay and apparently call her gynecologist.  I am not going to get into the details about the personal matters she discussed, but let me just say that it involved, “unusually large blood clots,” “foul-smelling discharge,” and “dryness.”  For a moment I thought I might be on that show “What Would You Do?“, so I decided to not act too obviously disgusted, you know, in case I was getting ready for my big close up.  However, once I realized that this was for real, I couldn’t believe that someone would discuss such personal matters in public.

~The End.

Photos by donmilleris.com, and Pinterest.

Dear Younger Me…

Trust me.

Often times getting what you want begins with one simple task:  Being nice.

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” -Dr. Seuss

Expect the unexpected.

Once you give your heart away, it’s hard to get it back, so choose the recipients wisely and carefully.

Refrain from using the words “always” and “never.”  Both are cripplingly absolute.

Better to be the person who keeps the peace than stirs the pot.

It’s important to have people in your life who believe in you, but even more vital to believe in yourself.

Let go of expectations of people, places, and things.  Why not let yourself be pleasantly surprised, than anticipating more, only to be let down?

Be someone who people can depend on, instead of someone who people say, “Oh, Sarah?  Yeah, she always bails on me.  You can’t count on her.” <–It sucks to be that person.

You. Must. Chill.

It’s okay to be a dreamer, but know that nothing happens overnight.  For 99.9% of people, anything worth achieving doesn’t come easily.  Don’t get caught up in the hyped up stories about the .1%.  Put the work in.

“Why fit in when you were born to stand out?” -Dr. Seuss (again)

Being a quitter gets a bad reputation, but sometimes your mental health is more important than putting yourself through something that makes you miserable.

Kick out “life drainers.”  Drainers are people who purposely try to bring you down, don’t have your best interest at heart, aren’t happy for you when good things happen, and are people who do their best to dull your sparkle.  Say goodbye to them and see how much better you feel afterward.

Don’t be afraid to look stupid.

Be honest…but not brutally honest.  I would say, be tactfully honest.  Sometimes being brutally honest just hurts people’s feelings.

(This one is for the girls)  If a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you for whatever reason; believe him, and then find someone who does.

Save your money.

“Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.” -Dr. Seuss (yes, one more time.)

Follow your heart, but don’t be stupid.

~The End.

Photo by Pinterest.

The Class of 2011 Most Over-Exposed Celebrity Superlatives

Can we talk about all the overexposed reality stars and celebrities for a minute?

Before I go any further, I would just like to say that almost all the people I’m about to call out, I have once been a fan of.  However, somehow or some way, they or their PR people ran rampant with their fame, and now every time I see them I cannot help but let out a huge groan saying, “Please, for the love, just go away for a while!  Please?”

What I’m wondering is why aren’t their agents, managers, public relations teams, families, friends, etc., giving them good advice and telling them to lay low for a little while?  Seriously, why is nobody doing that?!

With that, I bring you…

The Class of 2011 Most Over-Exposed Celebrity Superlatives:

Biggest Train-Wreck

Christina Aguilera

Duuuuuude, what happened to you?

Remember when X-Tina used to be a classy little babe?  Okay, so maybe she was never really “classy” per se, but she definitely used to take better care of herself.  Now, every time we hear about her, it’s either because she is wasted, flubbing the lyrics to the national anthem, or just acting like a train-wreck in general.  X-Tina, I think it might be time for an intervention…What do ya say?

Biggest Fraud

Miley Cyrus

Would Micky Mouse approve of this get-up?

I’m not going to be too hard on Miley, she’s young and maybe she’s just finding herself, but at the same time, when did she go from being a Disney darling to…well…what she is now?  Maybe it was all the private vaca’s with her boyfriends when she was 16, or maybe her parents gave her too much freedom?  Whatever the reason, Miley is way out of control, and she needs someone to bring her back to reality, or else her career is headed for La-Lohan ville.  C’mon Miley get it together, and take a break from the limelight for a minute, okay?

Most Dysfunctional Family

The Kardashian’s

I have no words for this caption.

I must confess, I really was a fan of the Kardashian’s for a long time, but somewhere between Kim’s 72 day marriage and Rob’s stint on Dancing With The Stars, I had an intense urge to scream every time I saw one (or all of them) on the tele.  Sure the show is funny…sometimes, but you can’t deny that they are quite dysfunctional.  Kourtney, Khloe, and Kim all talk openly and vulgarly about sex in front of their two young sisters, and overall, they are just inappropriate in every way, shape, and form.  The thing is, the Kardashian’s  have taken over the world, and here’s the kicker, none of them are talented!  For anything!  Wait, why are they famous again?  It’s time to leave America alone for a little while, Kardashian’s.  Please say you’ll give us a breather?  Maybe then we’ll miss you.  Maybe.

Biggest Loser

Ashton Kutcher

Ugh.

C’mon dude, really?  Why’d you have to play Demi like that?  Didn’t we all saw it coming though?  I don’t know about you, but I always felt like he was kind of using Demi for her fame.  He openly cheated on her multiple times, and after the second time, he didn’t even try to hide it.  It poses the question, was he trying to get caught, so Demi would have to be the one to pull the plug on the marriage?  Way to break up with her like a 7th grader, Ashton…Ugh, go away.

Biggest “I Want to Like You, But You’re Really Annoying Me Lately”

Taylor Swift

Dear Taylor, Please stop making this face. Thank you.

I want to like you, Taylor Swift, I really do.  You seem really sweet, and like a genuinely nice person, but you’re really annoying me.  Has anyone else wondered what Taylor Swift is so freaking surprised by?  First of all, she wins EVERYTHING!  She’s on the CMT awards sweeping it, the MTV awards winning everything, the Grammy’s taking home the most awards…so what the h is she so shocked by?  She would annoy me less if she just went up there to accept an award and said, “Wow, so I totally knew I was probably gonna win this, because let’s face it, I win everything and I’m awesome.”

Biggest Man-Eater

Jennifer Lopez

The ink isn't even dry on her divorce papers.

J-Lo hasn’t changed a bit in the 11 or 12 years she has been in the limelight.  She has always been the girl who jumps from one relationship to the next.  The ink isn’t even dried yet on her divorce papers to Marc Anthony, and she is already vacationing with a 24-year-old dancer.  I’m not sure if J-Lo doesn’t like to be alone, or if she just enjoys life more in a relationship, but either way, that’s her business and to each their own.  All I’m saying is, it’s okay if she doesn’t need a breather in between relationships, but America might need one, before we see her gallivanting with yet another lover.

Most Untalented Duo

Jessica and Ashlee Simpson

Why are these two famous again?

So, first came Jessica…she was cute and bubbly with an amazing voice circa 2000-2002, but then something happened.  She got bad advice, and started over-singing and making really disturbing faces while doing so.  A few years later, Ashlee rode on Jess’s coattails and came onto the scene.  Sure her reality show was entertaining for a minute, and her music was even kind of enjoyable, too.  However, both of their star power petered out by 2006-2007, but somehow they still remain in the celebrity news.  Why?  Neither one makes music anymore, and they’re not really doing anything worth reporting.  It might be time for the Simpson sister’s to retire.  Somehow I think Joe Simpson would have a problem with that, though…

Biggest Disaster/Most In Denial

Lindsay Lohan

Really Lindsay, no one told you painting F*** U on your nails for court appearance was a bad idea?

Lindsay Lohan…what is there left to even say that hasn’t already been said?  She is a disaster.  I feel bad for her in a way, because it doesn’t seem like she has anyone in her camp (including her mother) giving her good advice.  Instead, she only has people  enabling her bad behaviors, and re-enforcing her ridiculous antics.  Sadly, jail time wasn’t even a wake up call for this lost soul.  I don’t know what the future holds for La-Lohan, but my gut feeling tells me it’s not anything good.

So, tell me…

Who do you think is the most over-exposed in 2011?

~The End.

Photos by TMZ, People.com, usmagazine.com, and IMDB.

Why Miss Piggy and Kermit Are Gonna Make it, and Why Barbie and Ken Aren’t…

Barbie and Ken:

It’s no secret, Barbie and Ken have been together forever.

Good old Barb and Ken.

This picture is proof that Barbie and Ken have been together so long, that Ken hadn’t even discovered tanning yet, or highlights, and Barbie was still rocking the alabaster look.  Here’s hoping that when they finally discovered that being tan increased their attractiveness by 50%, that they at least went for a faux glow.

They’ve come a long way, huh?

It's amazing what a little tan and highlights can do...

Barbie and Ken have been through a lot over the years…

They got married…

Barb even had Princess Di's dress replicated...

They reproduced a beautiful child…

And named her Kelly.

But sadly, that still didn’t stop Ken from breaking up with Barbie in a very public way…

Barb, Ken wants a divorce...P.S. Who does that?!

Kind of makes you wonder what Barbie did to anger Ken so much…

Whatever the case was, Barbie and Ken separated, and a few years later Ken put up another public plea, but this time he wanted Barbie back…

Oh, Ken...Make up your mind!!

By Valentine’s Day 2011, Barbie had taken Ken back…Maybe it was for Kelly, or maybe she was just lonely without him, nonetheless they rekindled their love…

Sure, they look like the perfect couple on paper...

However, I personally think, that if Ken can break Barbie’s heart so publicly after all those years together, than I predict that their romance will no doubt eventually fizzle out again.  The point is, Barbie and Ken are the perfect couple on paper, but there is still something fundamentally wrong with their union, and we may never know what that is.

Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog:

Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog have a bit of a tumultuous relationship, too.

Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog have been together a long time, too, but let’s face it, they haven’t always been the ideal couple.

In the early days, Kermit was making desperate attempts to flee Miss Piggy’s advances…

Kermy was NOT having it...

But somewhere along the way he conceded.  Maybe Kermit felt it was easier to just give in to her, or maybe he really started to really fall in love with Miss Piggy.

Nonetheless the Pig and the Frog married each other…

Kermy is totally feeling the love now...

Sure their relationship has been plagued with rumors of Miss Piggy coercing Kermit the Frog into marriage, but the point is, neither Miss Piggy or Kermy have confirmed nor denied the rumors.

The one thing that is clear, is who wears the pants in the relationship…

Sure she outweighs him, but he doesn't seem to mind. In fact, I think he likes it that way.

The point is, unlike Barbie and Ken, who had a passionate courtship and are the perfect couple on paper, Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog’s love may not have started out ideal, but it grew over time.  They didn’t fall in love and get married right away, they were friends first, and that allowed their love to blossom over time.  Miss Piggy and Kermy have been through good times and bad, and have stayed together through it all.  That says something.

Most of all, Kermit the Frog could have easily put Miss Piggy on blast for pushing him into marriage, but he didn’t.  Unlike Ken, Kermy stuck by Miss Piggy no matter what.  What a guy, ahhh-hmmm…frog!

And that is why I think Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog have what it takes to make it.

Forever.

~The End

Photos by muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Kermit_the_Frog, http://www.sesamestreet.org/muppets, coolgreenmag.com, alifeofstyle.com, womenarealwaysbeautiful.blogspot.com, longislandpress.com, adpr1400.blogspot.com

The “Wrap it Up” and Other Tactics to Use During Your Next Awkward Encounter…

Have you ever ran into someone when you’re out somewhere, and awkwardly tried to  make conversation?

Even Larry had an awkward run in with Penny Marshall...

You know the kind of bumbling encounter where you clam up once you get past the “Hey, how are ya?” part.  They’re also the ones that you get yourself into because you feel guilty about doing another “oblivious stare in the distance” to avoid someone for the third time in one week.

Most of all they’re…

Awkward.

Uncomfortable.

And sometimes painful.

I always seem to experience these run-in’s when I have no make-up on, too.  It never fails.  In fact, I very rarely go out of the house without a stitch of make-up on, but every time I do, I run into someone.

Running into a someone you know might be inconvenient, especially when you don’t feel like talking, but it doesn’t have to be awkward.

I bring you…

Tactics to Use for Your Next Awkward Encounter

The Oblivious Stare Into the Distance

The “oblivious stare into the distance” is when you spot someone that you know, and act like you don’t see them.  This might mean you’re acting as if you’re intently reading a magazine in line at the grocery store, admiring the dandelions in the grass, acting as if you are rummaging for your phone in your purse, or basically focusing your attention on anything other than the person you are trying to avoid.  The funny thing about the “oblivious stare into the distance” is that the person you are trying to dodge always knows what you’re up to, which just makes it even more awkward than sucking it up and just saying hello.  That is why I am not really a fan of this tactic.

I have yet to master the “oblivious stare into the distance,” but I’ve gotten the treatment myself from the same girl at least five times.  I’m not even exaggerating.  I’m not really sure why I was running into her so much in the first place, but who knows, maybe it was karma giving her multiple chances to say hello to me.  The point is, she avoided me in a slew of different ways on five separate occasions, but by about the third time I took the hint, and didn’t even try to make eye contact to say hello to her.

Which made me think, doesn’t it take more energy to avoid someone?

The Wrap It Up

The “wrap it up” is when you’re in the midst of making awkward conversation, and you make the decision to end it.  This might mean you assertively interrupt the awkward silence with an “Okay, well great seeing you,” or a “See you later.”  The point is, you take the reins and put a period on the conversation.

Most people avoid running into someone, because they lack the skills to “wrap it up.”  I think that’s understandable.  Maybe you have a hard time gauging when it’s time to end the conversation, and you get anxiety from not knowing when or how to do just that.  Let me say, once you master the “wrap it up” you will never avoid running into someone ever again.  Part of the reason an awkward run-in is so bad, is because one or both of the people involved don’t know how to “wrap it up.”  Then, the conversation drones on and on, there is uncomfortable silence, you realize you have nothing else to say to each other, so you continue to just stand there with the clock ticking away, and usually when it’s finally over you think to yourself, “The next time I will just do the oblivious stare in the distance and avoid this all together!”

But don’t!  Just learn how to “wrap it up.”

The Walk Away

So, I know what you’re all thinking…

What about when you avoid someone because you know you’re going to get stuck talking to them forever?  These are the kinds of people who the “oblivious stare into the distance” doesn’t even faze.  They’ll boldly walk right up to you, and demand your attention.  You know if you get stuck talking to them, then they’re never going to shut up.  They’re the type of people who know when they should probably stop talking, but they don’t care, because they’ve captured you and now you are going to listen to everything they have to say.

Ugh, that’s the worst.

That is why you have to master the “walk away.”  Not to toot my own horn, but I am kind of the master of the “walk away.”

Basically the “walk away” is when you interrupt the conversation with a sudden but casual departure.  You can casually start taking steps backward while the other person is still talking, and say something like, “Wow, that’s so crazy!  Hey, good seeing you,” then you inconspicuously walk away.  Yes, it’s a little rude, but the other person will probably not find you insulting, and likely mistake you for being the awkward one instead of themselves.  The point is, you successfully got away from them, so everybody wins.

On a side note, you can also use the “wrap it up” in conjunction with the “walk away,” too.

My additional two cents…

Personally I think it’s easier to just suck it up and say hello to someone, instead of avoiding them all together.  The key is to keep it short and sweet.

For example:

Person 1:  “Hey how are you?”

Person 2:  “Good.  How are you?”

Person 1:  Doing well.  How is (insert any personal question here)?

Person 2:  Very well, thank you for asking.  Tell me, how is (insert personal question here)?

Person 1:  Everything is going well with (insert personal answer here).  Well, great seeing you.  (Notice that person 1 is the initiator of the conversation and the “wrapper upper.)

Person 2:  See you later!

That wasn’t too hard, was it?

Now that you have the tools, you’ll probably never avoid someone ever again, right?

Well, we’ll see…

~The End

Photo by IMDB…

Remember When…The TV Addition…

Remember when…

Daria was sooooo not amused, and Quinn wore baby tee’s every day?

Daria, you were so ahead of your time.

Or when…

Doug had the hots for Patty Mayonnaise?

Patti was quite the hottie.

Or when…

The Rugrats used to say cute words like, “nakey?”

Yikes, remember Angelica, too?

Remember when…

Jordan Catalano’s baby blues made up for his lack of social skills, and his ability to articulate?

Never was the word "like" used so much in one sentence, and never did it sound so good.

Or when…

Joey Potter couldn’t stop smiling and talking out of the side of her mouth?

"Dawson, I'm the girl that guys are friends with, not the girl that guys date." Oh Joey...

Or when…

Felicity chopped off her hair? (I’m still not over that one.)

Things got awkward when Felicity's hair was as short as both of the lead men on the show...

Remember when…

Nick and Jessica were so in love, and even farted in front of each other to show the whole world just how solid of a couple they were?

I wouldn't get too close to the danger zone if I were you, Nick, she's been known to clear a room.

Or when…

Jessica brought the shawl back, and the no make-up look?

P.S. Weren't these Jess's glory days? She never looked so good as she did on Newlyweds. Why is that?

Remember when…

Clarissa really did explain it all?

So young, but so wise...

Or when…

Blossom wore those weird hats?

I bet she wishes she could take this one back...

Or when…

Charles was in charge of our days and our nights?

What a guy, what a guy...

Or when…

Urkel loved his cheese, and Laura Winslow?

"Got any cheeeeeeese?"

Remember when…

Jessie Spano had a break down?

"I'm so excited...I'm so excited...I'm. So. Scared." <--What was the lesson to be learned here? That if you take too many diet pills, you're going to have a break down...or end up in a movie called Showgirls.

Or when…

Zack and Kelly broke up?  GASP!!!

Oh, the heartbreak...

Or when…

Slater used to call Jessie “Mama?”  <–Wee bit awkward.

Now that's what I call true love...

Remember when…

Kelly and Brenda fought over Dylan…for, like, centuries?

Three was definitely a crowd for these guys...

Or when…

Andrea Zuckerman looked entirely too old to play a high school student?

C'mon Aaron Spelling, she looks like a G-ma!

Or when…

Brandon had that awesome haircut?

Brandon was rocking the blow out long before Pauly D came onto the scene.

~The End.