Long Time, No Read…

Is anybody out there? …

I repeat…is anybody out there?

Bueller?

Bueller?

Ha.  It’s been a long, long while, but just wanted to pop in to say heyyyyyyyyyyyyy!  Oh, and to give you the link to an essay I wrote, which was featured on HelloGiggles today.  Hooray!  Very excited about that.

And just so you know, I miss you guys like candy…or candaaaaaaaaay (insert Mandy Moore’s twangy voice.)

I promise I’ll be talking to you soon!

http://hellogiggles.com/ode-long-lost-granny-sweater/#read

xo

Sarah

 

I’ve Been Working on the Rewrite…

I just wanted to pop in to let you all know that I am working on the final edits of the young adult novel I started last year.  I mentioned I was writing a novel in my New Years Eve post back at the beginning of this year.  I am getting ready to query agents in about a week, so it has been crunch time.  Not to sound pretentious, but I had writers block for about two months straight.  There was a part in the plot that had to be re-written, but I couldn’t figure out the best way to bring it together.  It all started to work its way out once I got over the hump, so I’ve been writing every single chance I can get, which has meant no blog posts.  Sorry about that!  I PROMISE I have a post coming soon (I already started writing it) but I have to crank this novel out first.

Anyway, I thought I’d leave you with a song I have been listening to inspiration while I finish up my novel.  Gotta love Paul Simon.

Listen here to –> 04 Rewrite

4 Awkward Things That Have Happened to me Lately…

1. Practically giving my client a shower at work the other day.

The experience should have been something like this.

Everyone can agree that when they go in to get a hair cut at a salon that the shampoo portion of their overall experience is essential, right?  It sets the stage and is sort of a foreshadowing of what the rest of the service will be like.  Well, the other day, I had a little mishap when shampooing my first client of the day.  The woman came in, swinging her bright orange purse, with an assertiveness that made me a little nervous.  She plopped down in the chair that sits in front of the shampoo bowl and told me exactly how she wanted her hair and then informed me that her main goal was to relax and “veg out for the next hour.”  I said okay, and proceeded to turn the water on, which was the part where, as if on cue, I lost control of the shampoo hose and accidentally sprayed her (and me) and the entire surrounding area around us.  The hose slipped out of my hand like it had a mind of its own.  The more I tried to catch it, the worse the water got all over the place.  I blurted out something frantic like, “I’m sorry there was conditioner all over it and it slipped out of my hand,” and braced myself for the reaming I was sure I was about to receive.  Luckily  she graciously forgave me as she dabbed her smeared mascara, and told me it was no big deal.  I was thankful, but I couldn’t help still feeling incredibly awkward after that.

2. Repeatedly getting stuck in awkward conversations with my landlord.

I have a hunch- the old lady cartoon dubbed “Maxine” could quite possibly have been based on my landlord.

Okay, so don’t get me wrong, I sort of love my old lady landlord who lives across the hall.  Sure, she is always popping out of her apartment and getting in the mix of whatever I’m doing, but she is incredibly entertaining.  She is great with one-liners, and she loves to counsel me on how to stay young.  Amongst her most quotable advice that I’ve already been given in the one short month we’ve lived in our apartment has been, “Eat chicken,” which she yelled out to me randomly one day as I was getting my mail in the foyer of our building.  Another one of her gems was, “Wait to have kids- kids complicate everything.” But probably my favorite words of wisdom so far was, “Eat corn- it keeps you regular so that you are not constipated.  Being constipated gives you wrinkles from clenching.

See the thing is, I never really know how to react to these haphazard statements, so I usually end up just smiling and nodding.  The one thing that I can be sure of, though, is that this landlord (who shall remain nameless) is certain to appear as a character in some of my writing in the future, because she is so fun, colorful, and wonderfully awkward.

3. Almost kicking the girl giving me a pedicure smack-dab in the face.

Picture this:  You have extremely ticklish feet and the girl giving you a pedicure is practically tickle torturing you with the nail filer.  It was stuff nightmares are made out of.  Trust me.  Last weekend I went in for a pedicure, and the girl who normally does my nails was busy.  I was in a hurry, so I took the first available nail technician.  I informed her that I was very ticklish feet and to bypass both the foot massage and heel filing part of the pedicure.  Well, I don’t think she understood me, and she must have thought I was telling her to simply do that part more gently, because she was being so delicate with my feet that after two straight minutes of her lightly scraping the heels of my feet with the foot filer, I couldn’t take it anymore and my foot sprang up involuntarily and came two inches from kicking her clean in the face.  I felt really bad and apologized a bunch of times.  However, even then I don’t think I got the message through, because she picked the torture device (foot filer) back up, and resumed lightly filing my feet.  Ugh.

4. Overhearing a TMI conversation.

Trust me honey, nobody wants to hear your convo.

I was oddly getting cell phone service on the subway the other day, when the train was stalled above ground for a few minutes.  There I sat, minding my own business and texting a friend, when a woman, around my age, had gotten on at the stop right before and sat down next to me.  Almost immediately, she decided to make the most out of the train delay and apparently call her gynecologist.  I am not going to get into the details about the personal matters she discussed, but let me just say that it involved, “unusually large blood clots,” “foul-smelling discharge,” and “dryness.”  For a moment I thought I might be on that show “What Would You Do?“, so I decided to not act too obviously disgusted, you know, in case I was getting ready for my big close up.  However, once I realized that this was for real, I couldn’t believe that someone would discuss such personal matters in public.

~The End.

Photos by donmilleris.com, and Pinterest.

Dear Younger Me…

Trust me.

Often times getting what you want begins with one simple task:  Being nice.

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” -Dr. Seuss

Expect the unexpected.

Once you give your heart away, it’s hard to get it back, so choose the recipients wisely and carefully.

Refrain from using the words “always” and “never.”  Both are cripplingly absolute.

Better to be the person who keeps the peace than stirs the pot.

It’s important to have people in your life who believe in you, but even more vital to believe in yourself.

Let go of expectations of people, places, and things.  Why not let yourself be pleasantly surprised, than anticipating more, only to be let down?

Be someone who people can depend on, instead of someone who people say, “Oh, Sarah?  Yeah, she always bails on me.  You can’t count on her.” <–It sucks to be that person.

You. Must. Chill.

It’s okay to be a dreamer, but know that nothing happens overnight.  For 99.9% of people, anything worth achieving doesn’t come easily.  Don’t get caught up in the hyped up stories about the .1%.  Put the work in.

“Why fit in when you were born to stand out?” -Dr. Seuss (again)

Being a quitter gets a bad reputation, but sometimes your mental health is more important than putting yourself through something that makes you miserable.

Kick out “life drainers.”  Drainers are people who purposely try to bring you down, don’t have your best interest at heart, aren’t happy for you when good things happen, and are people who do their best to dull your sparkle.  Say goodbye to them and see how much better you feel afterward.

Don’t be afraid to look stupid.

Be honest…but not brutally honest.  I would say, be tactfully honest.  Sometimes being brutally honest just hurts people’s feelings.

(This one is for the girls)  If a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you for whatever reason; believe him, and then find someone who does.

Save your money.

“Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.” -Dr. Seuss (yes, one more time.)

Follow your heart, but don’t be stupid.

~The End.

Photo by Pinterest.

The Art of a Theme Song…

Can we talk about theme songs for a minute?  Personal theme songs.  You know, like a song you listen to get pumped up, or a little ditty that plays over and over in your head that follows you through life.  In my opinion, everyone should have one.

Does anyone remember that show Ally McBeal from a few years back?  That show sort of pioneered the art of the theme song.  Remember when Ally danced for the first time with that weird computer animated baby to “Hooked on a Feeling” and got down?

“Hooked on a Feeling” became Ally’s theme song and a running gag on the show.

Or maybe you might remember more recently when Joseph Gordon-Levitt danced in the streets to Hall and Oates’ “You Make My Dreams Come True” in (500) Days of Summer?

My favorite part of the movie. Obviously. I’m a sucker for impromptu musical numbers.

Well, I got to thinking about theme songs today as I was walking down the blistering streets of Brooklyn in 98 degree heat, iPod-less, (because I accidentally left it at home) when one particular lyric to a song kept replaying over and over again in my head.  I tried to push it away and will a better, perhaps cooler song to take its place, but it was no use.  Katy Perry has taken over my life since I accidentally heard her song “Firework” in CVS yesterday.

So, there I was trying to cross the street as the song slowly began to creep in:

“You just gotta ignite the light, and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July

‘Cause baby you’re a firework
Come on, show ’em what you’re worth
Make ’em go “Oh, oh, oh”
As you shoot across the sky-y-y”

I tried to fight the song off as long as I could, but by the end of my walk home I was full-blown humming it and owning it <–Don’t judge me.  I kind of felt like Emma Stone in the movie Easy A when she opens up the musical card from her grandma that plays “Pocketful of Sunshine” and she groans, saying how much she hates the song.  Cut to a few hours later when she’s taking a shower and rocking out to it.

“I gotta pockeful, gotta pocketful of sunshine…I gotta love and I know that it’s all mine oh–oh–oh.”

If you listen to the rest of the lyrics to “Firework” you’re bound to feel that it’s a little silly:

“Do you ever feel like a plastic bag,
Drifting through the wind
Wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper-thin
Like a house of cards,
One blow from caving in?”

Do I ever feel like a plastic bag?!  Okay, so the song is pretty weak on imagery, but I’ve got to admit, it still kind of inspires me, though.

Take for instance these lyrics:

“It’s always been inside of you
And now it’s time to let it through.”

It reminds me of one of my favorite quotes by Dolly Parton: “The magic is inside you.  There ain’t no crystal ball.”

If you’ve never heard Katy Perry’s song “Firework” have a listen here…03 Firework

So, tell me…

~The End.

Photos by IMDB, and Pinterest.

You. Better. Work.

This past Wednesday I had the awesome opportunity of being the lead hair stylist on a photo shoot for the first time.  In the past I have merely assisted (which was also exciting), but I never got to be the one to collaborate with the creative director or dictate how I thought the hair should be styled.  On other shoots prior to this, I had always taken direction from a higher up, so it was inspiring to make the final call and do things my way.

So, when I was asked this past Monday if I was interested, I blurted out an enthusiastic “YES!,” even though I have a zillion things to do before Matt and I move next week.  It was too awesome of a chance to pass up.

The photo shoot was basically what they call a “test shoot,” which means that the photographer is taking the pictures for either their portfolio or website.  This particular shoot was really fun because it super laid back, and everyone was bouncing ideas off of each other.  At one point the clothing stylist asked me for my opinion on one of the male model’s attire. She asked, “Socks or no socks with shorts?”  I said, “No socks.  Definitely no socks.”

Something else cool about this particular shoot was that there was also someone there filming what was happening behind the scenes, so yours truly just might make an appearance in some of the footage.  I will keep you all updated as to when and where you can see it.

Here are some pictures from my point of view…

Washington Square Park

New York City street at dusk.

Notice the name at the top? It’s actually me, they just used my maiden name…

P.S.  Throughout this shoot, I could not get Rupaul’s voice out of my head singing, “Work, now turn the left. Work, now turn to the right…,” and I couldn’t help but laugh to myself.

~The End

Home In The Mitten State!

Hey!  Long time, no see!  Sorry I’ve been a little MIA for the last couple of weeks, but there has been so much going on!

First things first, I finally wrapped up this semester at school, and made the Dean’s List again!  Woo-hoo!

Then, Matt and I spent Christmas in Michigan this year with my family, and have had so much fun for the last week.

Christmas Eve was the big family celebration, and my whole family came over to celebrate.  Matt and I made up for time lost, and ate a ton of food.  I’ve probably gained about five pounds since we’ve been back in the States, but boy oh boy, it feels good!

My Mom's famous Gnocchi

We spent some long overdue time with my nieces and nephews…

Ain't they sweet?

They even got a visit from Santa Claus (aka my dad!) on Xmas Eve!

Rocco (my youngest nephew) with my dad (Santa). He totally bought into it, and thought it was Santa!

Santa's lil' helper, Tootsie (my parents dog.)

I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus…

My mom and dad. P.S. Santa asked her what she wanted for Christmas, and she told him "diamonds."

From the left...Rocco aka the Roc, Dylan aka Dyl-Pickle, Kayla aka Kooks, and Logan aka Logi-Bear.

My beautiful nieces, Allison and Kayla.

The next day, Matt and I opened presents from my parents and each other on Christmas morning…

A very special gift made by my mom. She saved my bridal bouquet, dried it a special way, and then framed it with our wedding invitation. How cool is that?!

We also got tickets to see my very favorite show, Wicked!

We went and saw the show today, and it was absolutely amazing!! P.S. I had to restrain myself from belting along to Defying Gravity!

My Christmas gift to Matt for our first married Christmas together.

Matt’s Christmas gift to me…

Isn't it gorge?! I LOVE it!

We’ve had such a blast in Michigan for the past week.  We’ve done all kinds of fun stuff!

We went to the Henry Ford Museum…

And we got to see the actual bus that Rosa Parks rode when she refused to sit at the back of the bus!

According to the tour guide, this is the actual spot that Rosa Parks sat in.

We saw the infamous car where Kennedy was shot…

And saw many, many more interesting and fascinating things.

Today we went to the Greektown casino in downtown Detroit…

We didn't win big or anything, but we didn't lose any money either!

And tomorrow we say goodbye to a wonderful and fun-filled week with family and friends in my hometown.

It’s been a good trip, and I’m happy I got to spend such quality time with those who are so special to me.

And…

It’s still good to be back in the States, and no, I don’t miss Grenada one bit yet at all!

So, tell me…

What did you get for Christmas?!

P.S.  I will be back to my regular blogging schedule after the New Year.  I’ve missed you all!

~The End

It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas…

I can’t believe it’s already December, and that Christmas and my birthday are right around the corner!

On Saturday, I am getting the best birthday gift of all, which is to fly back to New York…ahem… first class.  Woo-Hoo!  I seriously cannot wait!

It’s crazy to think that today I spent one of my last days in Grenada soaking up some sun, but by Saturday, we’ll be back to the blistering cold again.

Here’s a shot from the beach today…

Grand Anse Beach

And how appropriate that we should return back to a New York winter, considering the first time we arrived in Grenada, we were escaping one of the worst New York winters ever!

January 2010. One of our first days ever in Grenada.

I guess you could say, we are coming full circle.

I’m definitely looking forward to some snow, which I can’t believe I actually just said, but I truly am.  I think what I’m really excited about is just being back in the great U.S. of A, and being with our families for the holiday season.

I have to give it to Grenada, they really do a great job bringing the holiday vibe to the island, despite the uncharacteristically hot, balmy weather.  Since mid October (yes, mid-October) all the workers in the local shops have been sporting red Santa hats, and everywhere you go, they play Christmas music.  Get this, one of the most popular albums they play is Dolly Parton’s “Home For Christmas!”  If that’s not random, I don’t know what is!  Let’s just say, I’m thrilled about it!

Snazzy outfit, Doll.

I have to admit, though, it definitely hasn’t been easy to get into the holiday spirit, even with Dolly on my side.  That is why I cannot wait to soak up all the holiday season has to offer in New York with Matt’s family, and Michigan with my family.

I fully intend on watching some of my favorite holiday flicks like…

1.)  Serendipity

This movie captures the holiday’s in NYC perfectly, complete with a glove war at Bloomingdale’s, and ice skating at Rockefeller Center.

And maybe Matt and I might finally make it into the city for some frozen hot chocolate at  the famous Serendipity 3, where we’ve meant to go since we started dating 4.5 years ago!  We haven’t made it yet, but here’s hoping.

Serendipity 3, where the film Serendipity was shot. P.S. It's right around the corner from Bloomingdale's, too, which could be dangerous...or fantastic!

2.)  Little Women

Don’t make fun!  This is one of my movies ever, mostly because I remind myself of Jo.  By the way, I took a Facebook quiz not too long ago called, “Which March sister are you?”, and I got Meg!  I was seriously so mad, I took it 3 more times, until I manipulated it to tell me I was the most like Jo.  True story.

Oh Marmee...P.S. I think I might have my future children call me Marmee, how cute is that?

3.)  Love Actually

Does anyone remember the scene from this film where Keira Knightly marries her husband, and he surprises her with a gospel choir singing the Beatles tune “All You Need is Love?”

Well, Matt and I thoroughly looked into getting a gospel choir our wedding, but after some in-depth research on YouTube of other people who apparently thought it was a cool idea too, we decided against it.  Let me just say, some things are just better relayed on film than in real life, but I fully intend on reliving that moment watching “Love Actually” this Christmas.

4.)  A Christmas Story

This movie is such a gem.  If you’ve never seen it, I highly recommend it.

“You’re gonna shoot yer eye out!  You’re gonna shoot yer eye out!”

Poor Randy...

5.)  Meet Me in St. Louis

Come on, you knew a theater nerd couldn’t resist a musical to get into the holiday spirit, right?

Wasn't Judy G. a total betty in her day?

I don’t know, there’s just something about the way Judy sang “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” that gets me every time…

Anyway…

Hmmm…other things I’m looking forward to this holiday season…wearing my new down coat, sporting my Uggs with chunky sweaters, getting my huuuurr did, eating lots of cookies (particularly the sugar cookies with frosting that my sis-in-law makes), spending time with family and friends, eating my mom’s stuffed peppers, eating my mother in law’s meatloaf…I’m starting to notice that most of the things I’m looking forward to revolve around food…not done yet, though…drinking hot chocolate with whipped cream, pumpkin spice Coffee-Mate coffee creamer, Starbuck’s chai lattes, the sugar cookies with the Christmas tree’s and bells in the middle, my dad’s egg “mcmuffins”, pizzelle’s, and maybe some banana pancakes (made by Matt hopefully!).

So…

What are you all looking forward to this holiday season?

~The End

Photos by Amazon, IMDB, Wikipedia, and bytesdaily.blogspot.com

The Road to Hana = The Road to Hell…

Hey, did I ever tell you guys about the time Matt and I almost died on our honeymoon?  No, that’s right I never did, because we vowed afterward to never tell a soul.  However, I now have permission from the hubby to openly talk about the time we almost went kaput.

P.S.  You might want to grab some snacks because this could be a long one…

It all started on the sunny island of Maui…beautiful white sandy beaches, double rainbows, endless sunshine, and friendly locals.  We were having a wonderful time beaching, eating like there was no tomorrow (can you feel the foreshadowing?), and taking in authentic luau’s.

Nothing could go wrong, right? I mean, we even match.

So, on the fourth day of our trip we decided to take a day to do the Road to Hana.  For those of you who aren’t familiar with it, the Road to Hana is a stretch of winding highway with over 59 narrow bridges, 46 of which are only one-lane bridges. There are about 620 curves, and almost all of it is through lush tropical rainforests.  It takes about 3 hours to get to the end of the Road to Hana, and once you get to the end, it takes about 3 hours to get back to where you started.  Along the way, there are beautiful waterfalls to see, hidden secret pools to swim in, and lush botanical gardens to feast your eyes upon.  You don’t see any of these things by simply driving along the road, you have to pull over (basically on the side of a mountain with no railing) and find somewhere to park.  The thing is, everybody has the same idea, and there is virtually nowhere to park, so you find a small little nook anywhere, and pray your car won’t topple over a cliff.

I thought I’d give you a highlight reel of all the sights we saw before we almost died.

(If you don’t care, feel free to skip over this part…)

Road to Hana = Road to Hell

A botanical garden within the Garden of Eden.

We hiked a short trail to find this waterfall

Changs Pond. This is a hidden pool of water, that only the craziest locals jump into. Why? Because there is only a tiny patch of water where you can jump that is deep enough. If you miss the mark, then you are dunzo. Matt and I just happened to be there when this man made the jump. He was accompanied by his mother (as pictured) and three young daughters who were all screaming, "Please don't die, Dad," as he was jumping.

We drove along the highway took lots of pictures, and were having a great time.  We probably started the trip around 9 in the morning, and had every intention of being back at our hotel by 4 in the afternoon.  However, because we went on our honeymoon in July, which is one of the busiest times of the year for tourists, there were immense amounts of traffic.

The Road to Hana was packed, and it was taking much longer than we expected.  It was nearly 4 o’clock already, and we hadn’t even made it to the end, nor started the trip to get back.  The one thing we agreed on before this excursion even began, was that we didn’t want to be driving the Road to Hana at night under any circumstances.  However, we really wanted to get to the end of Hana, because there were still a few more things that we were dying to see.

For example…

The beautiful and infamous Black Sand Beach

A trail led to this cave on the Black Sand Beach

To be honest, even now I think we are really happy we decided to see the Black Sand Beach, because it was one of our favorite things about the Road to Hana.

So, back to the story…

We were forced to decide whether we should forgo the Black Sand Beach and other sights still left, or just turn around right then, and make it home before dark.  As we were discussing our options, we happened to notice that our trusty GPS said there was another way to get back, that didn’t require us to turn back around and follow the highway all the way back to where we started.  This route would also take half of the time, than the standard way we had planned on.  Too good to be true?

Well, we weren’t convinced, yet.  So, we pulled over and investigated the route in further depth, and even took a look at one of the maps provided in our guide book.  Sure enough there was a trail.  It looked like lots of tight turns, but what was the worst that could happen?  We had been driving along winding, narrow roads already all day.

This is pretty accurate...

We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into.  (Insert a DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN right about here.)

Silly tourists…

But we carried on as normal, took our time and saw the rest of what there was to see along the Road to Hana.  Soon enough we made it to the end, and the part where you normally would turn back around to where you came from.

Matt asked me one last time, “So, are you sure you wanna do this?”

“YES!” I agreed enthusiastically.  Anything to get me back to the hotel sooner…I was starving, and I had to pee really bad.

So, off we went…

As we started driving, we noticed that we didn’t see any other cars around.  Hmmm…that was odd.

All of the sudden the paved road turned into a gravel road, but we were still okay.  We had a Wrangler, and that kind of car should be able to handle gravel roads, right?

We kept driving, and I started getting really nervous, because as I looked behind me and in front of me, there still weren’t any other cars on the road…

We started to make our way on the gravel road up a mountain, with no railing may I add, and the road got narrower and narrower.  My heart was beating out of my chest, because the road had tapered off so much, that our car barely fit on this road.  We kept climbing up the mountain, getting further into danger, and where there was no room for error.  The slightest mistake would have sent us tumbling off a cliff.  When Matt started to panic, I knew that I should be worried, and when he said, “I think we better find a way to turn around,” I was downright terrified.

We kept driving for about three more minutes, all the while breaking no more than 3 miles per hour.  We came upon a tiny place in the road where we thought there might be enough room to turn the car around.  He started to make a three-point turn, but soon realized there wasn’t enough room.  We were almost hanging off the edge.  He quickly turned the car back around, and we were forced to keep going.

So, we did what we had to do, and kept forging ahead.  In silence.  We were both too scared to speak.  I looked at my phone to see if I had any service.  There was no service.  This made me panic even more, but I didn’t say a word.  As we continued, we got further and further up a mountain, and that was when I heard a crashing.  I couldn’t help it, I had to look over the edge.  There was water, lots of it, crashing up to heights I’ve never seen before.  Water was splashing into our car.

Holy hell, this might not be okay…

I started to think about what would happen if our car went over the edge.  Would we be able to escape the car, if we even survived the crash?  Or would the violent waves keep knocking us into the sharp side of the rocky mountain?  I worried that our families would never know what happened to us, and I worried that no one would ever find us.  I prayed over and over that we would make it home okay.

I noticed along the way that the only signs we saw said “Service Road.”  Well, that wasn’t right.  These were not roads that you were suppose to travel on, but how were we suppose to know?  The GPS led us that way.

Eventually the road wound back down and we were on solid land, but it was only temporary.

Here are a few shots from what we saw when we were briefly on solid ground…

Solid ground but only for a moment. Now imagine this road getting narrower and narrower, and turning into the side of a cliff. Scary right?

Just a cool shot

Me and the Wrangler...

The road kept winding back up cliffs, and then winding back down to solid ground.  Eventually it got dark out, and that was probably the scariest part.  We simply drove slowly, took our time driving no more than about 6 miles per hour, and the whole process beginning to end took about 6 hours to complete.  Thankfully we also gassed up before starting the ride back, or else we would have ran out of gas…and that would have been worse.

Through our entire drive we never saw another soul on the road.

I was proud of Matt for staying so calm, and proud of myself for navigating us through the ordeal.  Even though it makes me extremely nauseous to read while riding in a car, I was able to read a map through all the twists and turns of the road.

I obviously don’t have pictures of the scariest parts of the trip, because we were both concentrating too much on not dying.  Though, I kind of wish I had a few to look back on now…

For the next two days of our honeymoon, we stayed on flat land, ate flavored ices on the beach, and thanked our lucky stars that we lived.

Ah, relief!

On the last day of our trip, we stopped in a jewelry store.  I wanted to open up an oyster to see if I would get a pearl.  I’ve always wanted to do that.

So, the saleswoman got out a big bucket, and she told me to pick one.  I selected one from the top.  She pried it open with a special tool, and it cracked open.

Inside of it, was not one, but two light pink pearls.  Besides the fact that my favorite color is pink, the saleswoman told us that pale pink pearls mean Protection, Life, and Love.

And how ironic that there should be two?  One for me, and one for Matt.

And two for Protection, Life, and Love.  Enough for the both of us.

~The End.

Photo by Bluntcard.

The “Wrap it Up” and Other Tactics to Use During Your Next Awkward Encounter…

Have you ever ran into someone when you’re out somewhere, and awkwardly tried to  make conversation?

Even Larry had an awkward run in with Penny Marshall...

You know the kind of bumbling encounter where you clam up once you get past the “Hey, how are ya?” part.  They’re also the ones that you get yourself into because you feel guilty about doing another “oblivious stare in the distance” to avoid someone for the third time in one week.

Most of all they’re…

Awkward.

Uncomfortable.

And sometimes painful.

I always seem to experience these run-in’s when I have no make-up on, too.  It never fails.  In fact, I very rarely go out of the house without a stitch of make-up on, but every time I do, I run into someone.

Running into a someone you know might be inconvenient, especially when you don’t feel like talking, but it doesn’t have to be awkward.

I bring you…

Tactics to Use for Your Next Awkward Encounter

The Oblivious Stare Into the Distance

The “oblivious stare into the distance” is when you spot someone that you know, and act like you don’t see them.  This might mean you’re acting as if you’re intently reading a magazine in line at the grocery store, admiring the dandelions in the grass, acting as if you are rummaging for your phone in your purse, or basically focusing your attention on anything other than the person you are trying to avoid.  The funny thing about the “oblivious stare into the distance” is that the person you are trying to dodge always knows what you’re up to, which just makes it even more awkward than sucking it up and just saying hello.  That is why I am not really a fan of this tactic.

I have yet to master the “oblivious stare into the distance,” but I’ve gotten the treatment myself from the same girl at least five times.  I’m not even exaggerating.  I’m not really sure why I was running into her so much in the first place, but who knows, maybe it was karma giving her multiple chances to say hello to me.  The point is, she avoided me in a slew of different ways on five separate occasions, but by about the third time I took the hint, and didn’t even try to make eye contact to say hello to her.

Which made me think, doesn’t it take more energy to avoid someone?

The Wrap It Up

The “wrap it up” is when you’re in the midst of making awkward conversation, and you make the decision to end it.  This might mean you assertively interrupt the awkward silence with an “Okay, well great seeing you,” or a “See you later.”  The point is, you take the reins and put a period on the conversation.

Most people avoid running into someone, because they lack the skills to “wrap it up.”  I think that’s understandable.  Maybe you have a hard time gauging when it’s time to end the conversation, and you get anxiety from not knowing when or how to do just that.  Let me say, once you master the “wrap it up” you will never avoid running into someone ever again.  Part of the reason an awkward run-in is so bad, is because one or both of the people involved don’t know how to “wrap it up.”  Then, the conversation drones on and on, there is uncomfortable silence, you realize you have nothing else to say to each other, so you continue to just stand there with the clock ticking away, and usually when it’s finally over you think to yourself, “The next time I will just do the oblivious stare in the distance and avoid this all together!”

But don’t!  Just learn how to “wrap it up.”

The Walk Away

So, I know what you’re all thinking…

What about when you avoid someone because you know you’re going to get stuck talking to them forever?  These are the kinds of people who the “oblivious stare into the distance” doesn’t even faze.  They’ll boldly walk right up to you, and demand your attention.  You know if you get stuck talking to them, then they’re never going to shut up.  They’re the type of people who know when they should probably stop talking, but they don’t care, because they’ve captured you and now you are going to listen to everything they have to say.

Ugh, that’s the worst.

That is why you have to master the “walk away.”  Not to toot my own horn, but I am kind of the master of the “walk away.”

Basically the “walk away” is when you interrupt the conversation with a sudden but casual departure.  You can casually start taking steps backward while the other person is still talking, and say something like, “Wow, that’s so crazy!  Hey, good seeing you,” then you inconspicuously walk away.  Yes, it’s a little rude, but the other person will probably not find you insulting, and likely mistake you for being the awkward one instead of themselves.  The point is, you successfully got away from them, so everybody wins.

On a side note, you can also use the “wrap it up” in conjunction with the “walk away,” too.

My additional two cents…

Personally I think it’s easier to just suck it up and say hello to someone, instead of avoiding them all together.  The key is to keep it short and sweet.

For example:

Person 1:  “Hey how are you?”

Person 2:  “Good.  How are you?”

Person 1:  Doing well.  How is (insert any personal question here)?

Person 2:  Very well, thank you for asking.  Tell me, how is (insert personal question here)?

Person 1:  Everything is going well with (insert personal answer here).  Well, great seeing you.  (Notice that person 1 is the initiator of the conversation and the “wrapper upper.)

Person 2:  See you later!

That wasn’t too hard, was it?

Now that you have the tools, you’ll probably never avoid someone ever again, right?

Well, we’ll see…

~The End

Photo by IMDB…