Forever Young-ish…

Anyone catch a glimpse of their reflection in the self-checkout video at Target? Let me tell you, that sucker doesn’t lie. I did yesterday and WTH, like, I’m old now?? Is it just bad lighting?? Tell me it’s bad lighting. Why do I look ill? What’s happening???? I had a full face on, and yet, I looked old af. Someone talk me off a cliff here. Please.

I guess it’s all hitting me because I’ve been on a long-ass trip to Denial City for at least a few years now. Even when I’ve recently been finding gray hairs sprouting up, it’s like my brain turns off from the concept that I’m aging, and goes to a safe place where I assume everyone who sees me out with my two kids probably thinks I’m the nanny. Who do I think I am??! Benjamin Button?

I need to get a grip or at least some Botox… I’ve heavily started my obsessive-level research on all things injections and lasers, thank you very much.

I guess you could say Target was my age defining moment.

But please tell me I’m not alone in this? Was anyone else living in a delusional fantasy until they were thrust into the real world with a firm push in the way of sneaky surveillance cameras revealing their true form? I’m not spiraling or anything. Or rambling. I don’t know why you’d be thinking that.

Tell me your stories of accepting age, please. Or at least tell me how young I look.

11 thoughts on “Forever Young-ish…

  1. Oh good Lord that hit me a couple years before I turned 40. I saw a spot on my hand that I thought was melted chocolate or something (I have kids so you never know) when I was driving to work. I kept trying to lick it off. It was an age spot!!! I was like what the hell is this!! Now at 43 I swear I look like an old lady with driving gloves on so the sun keeps its ass off my hands!

  2. You are not alone!

    The last time I had my haircut, (Full Disclosure: Supercuts) I surveyed the frosty tufts of hair below me and said “damn, I’m getting up there.” The response from the stylist was a generous, empathetic and totally ridiculous comment to the fact I was starting to look “distinguished.”

    Guess I’ll need a tweed suit and a pipe soon.

    Guys maybe the last to acknowledge it, but nobody wants to look older! I’m a dad, what do I need to look distinguished for?!

    Nature’s first green is gold!

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