No Soup For You.

You guys are never going to believe what just happened to me.

Before I get into it, does anyone remember this guy?

You know the "Soup Nazi" who tormented Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer on Seinfeld?

I only ask, because I basically just had an Elaine moment. <–P.S.  I said Elaine, because she was the only girl in the group, and I really like her hair…but not when she wears it half up and half down…never mind.

Anyway, my latest food fixation is Subway.  It’s not really a new discovered food craving per se, but more of a rediscovery.  Every night for the past week and a half, I have been making my way down the little hill from where our apartment is, and to the Subway on campus.  Yes, it’s the same Subway where I gave the infamous girl my headband.  If you don’t remember, perhaps you might want to refresh your memory and read Who does that?!?!!  Like, seriously who does that?!!!

So, Subway and I have been having quite a love affair, and it’s been presenting itself in the form of a footlong turkey on wheat, with lettuce, tomato, lots of cucumbers, and vinegar (hold the oil.)  I’ve had a nice little routine going; I get a footlong, and eat half for dinner, and the other half for lunch the next day.

I’m not going to say my experience at Subway is always easy, because it’s not.  I’m even going to go as far as to say, that to get that footlong sub, it’s a labor of love.  In fact, I usually have to put up with quite the debacle, before finally sinking my teeth into my delicious sub.  For example, on average, I usually end up waiting in line for at least 20-25 minutes (even if there are only 2 or 3 people in front of me).  So, now do you get the point?

Tonight, I went to Subway for the 15 consecutive day in a row, but it was not like the normal fiasco’s that I have become so familiar with.  This time it was different…and not in a good way.

Here is the part where I will give you a blow by blow of how it all went down.

Me:  Hi, how are you?

Just like Elaine, I nonchalantly ordered my sandwich.

1st Sandwich Artist:  (Looks at me and rolls her eyes.)

Me:  Can I please have a footlong turkey on wheat?

1st Sandwich Artist:  (Rolls her eyes again.)  She then pulls out an extremely burnt piece of bread from a cooling rack behind her, and proceeds to try and cut it.  However, it’s so burnt, that the bread has become rubbery, and the knife gets stuck.

Now let me just interject a little something here.  For some reason I always get the burnt bread.  Always.  It never fails, I’ll look at the person in front of me and behind me, and they always have these perfectly baked golden subs, and mine is always crusty and burnt.  The thing is, I never ever say anything, because I don’t want to be a pain, but today I was just over the burnt bread.  So, I said something…

Me:  Excuse me, I don’t mean to be a pain, but can I get a different piece of bread that is not so dark?

1st Sandwich Artist:  That’s all we have.

Lie, lies, lies.  I looked at a cooling rack directly behind her, and there were at least 50 different subs that were not burnt.

Me:  Okay.

I was annoyed, but what can you do? 

My sub then got moved onto the part where you get veggies, leaving me with no chance to protest, even if I wanted to.

1st Sandwich Artist:  What do you want?

Me:  Can I please have lots of lettuce, tomato, and lots of cucumbers please?

She then proceeded to stingily put some lettuce on the sub, but it didn’t even cover the entire footlong.  I reasoned, maybe she thought I said a little lettuce and not a lot?

Me:  I’m sorry but could I have a little more lettuce?

She totally ignored me, and proceeded to slop on two tomato’s that were rotten looking and yellowy, and put on three tiny pieces of cucumber. 

Umm…wait a sec, didn’t I ask for extra lettuce and cucumbers?  What is wrong with this picture?!  I look at my sad footlong sub staring through the glass at me, and I knew I had to fight for my sub.

Me:  I’m sorry, but can I please have more cucumbers?  (I didn’t even bother with the lettuce or tomato’s.)

1st Sandwich Artist:  She rolled her eyes at me again, and proceeded to pick out the tiniest cucumber, putting ONE more on.

I felt my blood starting to boil, but I kept telling myself, “It’s just a sandwich.  Chill out.”  But no, I couldn’t chill out.  

I watched as she pushed the sandwich onto the 2nd Sandwich Artist for the dressing, and whispered something in her ear, though I didn’t know what.

I ignored them, and focused my attention on the 2nd Sandwich Artist.

Me:  Excuse me, can I have some more cucumbers?  (Notice I was no longer saying please.)

2nd Sandwich Artist:  No.

Me:  No?

I'm fairly certain I also made this face...

2nd Sandwich Artist:  No.

Now I know how Elaine felt.

Me:  Why?

2nd Sandwich Artist:  Because she (meaning 1st Sandwich Artist) already gave you extra.

Me:  But she didn’t give me extra, she didn’t even put enough on to cover the whole sandwich to begin with.

2nd Sandwich Artist:  No.

Me:  What are you even saying “no” to?

Random guy behind me starts chuckling.

2nd Sandwich Artist: No.

Me: Okay well, I’ll pay for extra cucumbers….

On a side note, I know for a fact there is an option on their cash register to pay for extra veggies, because just the other day I got charged $1.50 extra for  jalapeno’s.

2nd Sandwich Artist: No.

Me:  Okay, so let me get this straight…I can’t have extra cucumbers on my sandwich, and I can’t buy them either?  I’m sorry, I’m just a little confused here.  Why?

2nd Sandwich Artist:  Because she already gave you extra.

1st Sandwich Artist and 2nd Sandwich Artist look at each other and roll their eyes.

That was it.  The last duo eye roll did me in.

I saw red.

Me:  You’re rude (I looked at 1st Sandwich Artist), and you’re rude ( I looked at 2nd Sandwich Artist), and I don’t want your sh*tty sandwich.

And that was that.  I walked out without my sandwich, and I didn’t even care, because I walked out in a freaking blaze of glory.  The guy standing behind me applauded me.  No  really, he actually clapped for me.  The whole thing was ludicrous.  I forgot to mention, it was the end of the night, don’t they usually just throw the uneaten veggies away at the end of the night anyway?!  It was clear that they were just trying to be rude, and it worked.

By the time I got home the adrenaline had worn off, and I was actually kind of bothered about the whole thing.  I’m not going to lie, I was mostly sad that I could never show my face in my favorite Subway again, and I was sad that my love affair with my footlong turkey subs on wheat, had come to a crashing halt.  I was also a little disappointed about how I was treated.

Oh well.

At least I went out Terminator style.

Oh Yeaaaaaaaahhhhhh

~The End.

Photos by IMDB

33 thoughts on “No Soup For You.

  1. I loved the Terminator picture! But I can’t believe how rude they were. As I started typing this, my husband ticked my back, and when he stopped, I asked for more. He tickled a little (little!) more, and I asked for more again, and he goes, “This is more than more!” Now THAT is what they should’ve done for you. More than more.

  2. Good for you. Now you should follow up with a phone call to the owner of that location and to Subway Corporate. I am so tired of going to fast food/casual places and being treated as though my sandwich artist/ server/ host whatever is doing me a FAVOR by waiting on me. I now call and email when I get bad service. I also make a point of calling and emailing when I get good service. It let’s the managers know who of their employees are working hard to keep me as a customer. Over the past year, I’ve seen service go way way up at the places I frequent.

    • Honestly, if I was in the States, I wouldn’t hesitate about calling to complain, but here in Grenada, it won’t get you very far…probably just more frustrated!!! Ahh! Oh well! Thanks for reading;)

  3. HaHAHA I am laughing so hard right now, did you know I used to be a sandwich artist at Subway in Utah as my first job… pretty sweet huh… I would have never treated you that way. Ever.. Your next Michigan trip I will show you how its done.. lol

    • Hahaha! Lac, my first job was a sandwich artist at Subway, too! I could teach these b’s a thing or two about the artistry of the sub:) LOL

  4. They are lucky !! You showed alot of restraint, I would have let them have it!! You should have taken that sub and thrown it right back at them!! Thank goodness at most Subway shops the sandwich artists bend over backwards to please the customer! Maybe the Grenadians could take some lessons on customer service! : )

    • Yeah, they ARE lucky, because I could have given them the same treatment as the tuxedo guy at Men’s Warehouse…and we all remember how that went down! Hahaha!

  5. This made me laugh so much. I hate people being rude me but I’m always too scared to say anything… Anyway, Good for you!
    – I loved the Terminator picture by the way 🙂

  6. Oh Sarah, this post had me laugh out loud on multiple occasions! I can totally remember this exact incident (in so many words) happening repeatedly in Grenada. They were “out” of Micah’s preferred sandwich for the last 2.5 MONTHS we were on the island, even though our neighborhood IGA sold all of the ingredients! Cheer up buttercup, you’ll be in the land o’plenty soon enough, and I PROMISE… you will get as many damn cucumbers as you want!!!!!

    • Omg Karla. You really should have been here. You. Would. Have. Been. HYSTERICAL. Like, she put ONE more cucumber on. ONE!!! It was a freaking joke. Oh well!!

  7. I usually do not say anything either in situations like this, but like you every once in a while I see red, especially when I am paying for something that is not up to snuff. I remember the Soup Nazi and think he is burnt into my brain – ha! I have been standing up more lately in situations like this because I am simply tired of rudeness, stupidity and bad/horrible/despictable customer service. YOU GO GIRL!!!

    • That’s exactly how I feel too…I am sick and tired of rudeness! When you work with the public, being nice isn’t an option! You have to be nice, even when you don’t want to!

    • Omg, now see that was awesome! I loved it! What’s funny is that I totally thought that I invented it, but apparently not! Ha!

  8. Wow! I have been a customer of “Subway” for years but haven’t encountered that problem fortunately. My sister on the hand says that one day she had to walk out on a young man behind the counter that kept rolling his eyes as she took the time to ask her Spanish-only speaking friend exactly what she wanted. To boot, she said there was no one else in line!
    I’m glad you stood up for yourself but they also need to have corporate alerted to this. If they don’t do anything, you could always burn them on their social media sites. That may be a bit catty but an option.

    • Wow, that story was almost as bad as mine! I know what you mean, though, I think I really am going to make a complaint about it.

  9. hi, i got to your blog by clicking random links, and somehow got here. so glad i did! 🙂 this almost made me spit coffee out all over my computer. so funny! thanks for the amazing laugh!

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